When pulling off something manly..
When my family asked to use my tablet to view photos.
How my Toddler acts when I tell him he can't get up until he finishes his food.
When I see a stray cat walking on the sidewalk.
When I post something on Facebook and then realize it's offensive to 80% of my family.
You are not the father.
When I'm home alone and I hear a sound.
When I'm having sex and realize there is still pizza leftovers in the fridge.
When someone tries to get my attention when I'm stoned.
When I suddenly smell bacon.
When a girl tells me to cover my eyes while she changes.
When I find a 30% off promo code right before check out.
